Day 22-27 (Bday week. yikes) getting back on track

So, I was very optimistic about my bday week. I told myself I was going to have ONE cheat day and then get back on track. However, my mom called me and told me she would help us get to San Antonio to spend time with me for my bday. So many things happened. Here are some of the things I ate this week:

Now obviously, not everything was bad (like the acai bowl and oatmeal), but I did eat a lot of other bad stuff. I'm torn, because a part of me doesn't feel guilty for eating these foods; I was celebrating and it was fun. However, there is a huge part of me that struggles emotionally and mentally with eating "bad" foods. I've gone through a borderline eating disorder before, and I felt myself having really dark thoughts. There was one night where I saw a video of my family singing happy bday to me, and I cried myself to sleep because I hated the way I looked. I had to surrender that to The Lord.

Anyway, I don't feel bad that I ate this, but I am getting back on track starting tomorrow. I already went grocery shopping and planned my meals.

Here is to year 24 and loving myself more. Not because of the way I look, but because of who I am.